A profound self care tip while grieving the death of a loved one · Pavitra Gurumurthi Transition Mentor
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A profound self care tip while grieving the death of a loved one

A profound self care tip while grieving the death of a loved one

The experience of loss is ever present in our every day lives. Most of these experiences involve little to no emotional interaction so they go fairly unnoticed.

But then there are those losses that impact the very nature of our understanding of life i.e. losing our childhood, a way of living, moving countries, losing our job status, divorce and losing a loved one to death.

You would expect to develop more resilience with each experience of loss, yes?

But the truth is, resilience is not what loss is here to teach.

Loss is present as a reminder to:

  • develop patience and tender loving care in the way you look after your heart
  • adopt a graceful approach towards the natural unfolding of life
  • have a willingness to surrender to your vulnerability and sensitivity, and
  • to be respectable of death in its most divine form

With loss, comes grief.

Grief is undefinable by emotional standards.

There aren’t enough words to fully express the nature and extend to which grief stretches the emotional capacity to experience pain and love, all at the same time.

To me, this is an integral part of building insurmountable faith not only in yourself but also in your reason for existing.

So, how can one support this stretching so that it does not turn into ripping apart?

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Now, the current nature of self-care is overrated.

This may sound counter-intuitive to the topic of this article but bear with me for just one moment.

Everywhere you look, there are innumerable lists that speak of self-care.

Most of which are valid, highly effective ways towards self-care.

Dare I say, I have even created one myself.

And yet I observe in myself and in others, an undeniable struggle to know how to self-care.

Without the key driving factor, all self-care techniques remain ungrounded and ultimately ineffective.

What is the key driving factor?

Practising moment to moment masterful presence to the sensitivity of your emotions.

How are you to recognise and implement any of the self-care strategies if you are not in touch with your deepest emotional needs?

Emotions are like the ocean and your body, a container for these emotions.

When you experience loss, it is much like a tsunami, an upheaval of your emotional state.

An impact on your body as powerful as this requires awareness of how you react and navigate through the rainbow of emotions held within your body at varying intensities.

So, when you practice moment to moment masterful presence to the sensitivity of your emotions, you:

  • acknowledge its presence
  • become aware of what you need, instead of a checklist that tells you what you should need
  • cultivate inner strength to safely express your primal emotions
  • allow your emotions to guide you through the healing process
  • grow into accessing the range of emotions that you are here today, alive to feel

In this way, you create a space within and around for all your emotions to move through freely thereby eliminating the need to project, fix, turn away or freeze.

You become so much more in tune, vibrant and soulful in your ability to not only care for yourself and those around you too.

My wish for you

May self-care be a way to honour your core emotional needs, as they arise, in the moment, trusting the flow of your own heartbeat.

Free Guide To Exploring Loss Through Journalling (includes 24 prompts to get you started)