I wake up in the morning and the first thing I see is my reflection in the mirror. There was a time in my life not so long ago, when I cringed every single time I looked in the mirror. Everything felt off – the visible and the invisible parts of me. I wasn’t at peace with who I was.
Living on foreign land, surrounded by people who looked (and behaved) differently to me only added to the feeling of dis-ease with being myself. It appeared, to my psyche, that everyone had it better than me – life experiences, looks, social connections, family ties, you name it. I would look at people around me and feel my heart contract as I was reminded each time of how unhappy, disconnected and different I really was.
Until one life-changing moment in 2008, when a precious soul said to me,
‘Pavitra, have you REALLY looked at yourself in the mirror? I believe you do not see what the rest of the world sees.’
Thus began my journey into some serious self-inquiry of who I really am.
Seeing yourself in the mirror
It is only natural to notice our physical appearance when we look in the mirror. We either recoil, critique, fix or feel good about our appearance. And off we go, until the next moment when we are faced with a mirror again. But what happens when we catch our eyes, if only, for a split-second and sense something more than what meets the eye?
Our eyes are the windows to our soul. They speak only one language, that of energy. A language that the human brain is unable to translate. Our eyes not only respond to the external environment but incessantly project out, to the world, the true essence of who we are.
So, the next time you are in front of the mirror again, take a minute (or two) to really look into you eyes. Feel what is really within you. Recollect every compliment received, from strangers and loved ones, and see yourself what is already being acknowledged by the world outside of you. Honour that which you are. And then thank yourself for choosing the vehicle that is your human body to express itself fully as a vital presence in the making of this universe.
Seeing yourself in others
We are but social creatures unable to survive in isolation for long, the human tribe supporting our existence and defining our lives with every interaction. And yet these interactions can be the very basis of our dissatisfaction.
Ironic? Yes. Surprising? No. When our interactions with another lacks the flow that is required to vibrate at the same frequency as our own values, morals, thought-processes and expectations, we become dissatisfied.
First step is to acknowledge the dissatisfaction
- it is what it is – neither good nor bad;
- it is where our most incredible transformational powers reside; and
- it is the foundation of the dual nature of life that we exist within
Our dissatisfactions are mirror reflections of what we may not be at peace with, within ourselves.
You are disconnected from your emotions, so you will inevitably find yourself in situations where people in your life feel emotionally unsafe (to varying degrees) with you.
You have a fear of intimacy, so life situations and people will mirror to you their inability to see your vulnerable side that is genuinely craving for nurturing, care and unconditional love.
You struggle with anxiety, so you come to head with people or situations that are unable to provide you with the level of safety/security that you desire.
Next time you find yourself feeling angry, frustrated, sad or dissatisfied – tune into your feelings and inquire which part of you is needing your undivided attention for healing?
Seeing yourself in nature
That beautiful flower!
What a gorgeous sunset!
The ocean, so expansive and nourishing!
There goes a pretty little bird!
This is you.
I don’t really like that storm coming through, looks a bit harsh.
I am not a big fan of that tree that is growing in the middle of the park.
I dislike how brown the river looks today.
This is also you.
This is the nature of duality.
However, we all have a choice.
We can either embrace the dual nature of your existence, breathe in the effortless flow of life and fully commit to healing wounded aspects of ourselves or judge the mirror reflections as something separate to us thereby creating more separation within us.
What will you choose?