How to overcome challenges of self-care during difficult times · Pavitra Gurumurthi Transition Mentor
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How to overcome challenges of self-care during difficult times

How to overcome challenges of self-care during difficult times

I want to acknowledge that we are, as a collective, grieving the upheaval of a reality that once was and the void that we find ourselves currently in. And right now more than ever, we are nudged from every direction to take care of ourselves, and this is not just physically.

When I started my journey of self-care more than fifteen years ago, I remember being completely out of alignment with my mind, body and spirit. I was more than determined to dedicate time and commit towards various self-care practices to overcome feelings of anxiety, disconnection and malaise. For a while I even felt proud that I had a regimented approach and thought I would find much success in this process.

To this day, I vividly remember years of feeling more confused and often drained after trying out various methods and techniques towards self-care. I felt I had failed miserably. And I even became cynical about self-care as I wasn’t seeing evidence of the fruits of my labour.

Do you find yourself experiencing a similar challenge with self-care?
Even when consistently following your self-care practices you are often left feeling worse than when you started?

You are not alone.

To understand the core challenge towards self-care, it is paramount that you first understand what CARE means.

For that, it helps to disengage from the theoretical understanding of self-care for a minute to avoid conceptual mental discussions. And address what is alive in your body when you tune into the word CARE.

What feelings arise within you when you read or hear the word CARE?
What sensations do you observe in your body?

When I tune in now, my body responds to feelings of warmth, gentleness, tenderness, kindness, nurturing and a whole lot of compassion. But these were not the same feelings from fifteen years ago. Back then, my body’s response to care was constriction, rigidity, over protection, suffocation and lack of freedom. If I had known back then the difference in how my body was reacting to care, I would have adopted self-care methods that addressed these feelings without dismissing them. I wouldn’t have forced a set of guidelines towards care that I imagined would work.

So, observe what feelings arise within you.
Maybe they’re the same, maybe they’re not.

It is important to recognise and honour your body’s individual response in this moment.

Accept your feelings.

Trust your feelings.

This is where self-care begins.
When you are able to identify your organic response to your needs, you are then better able to practice self-care.

But how do you identify your core organic responses?

There is only one way.

That is by maintaining absolute, complete, undivided presence to the sensitivity of your emotions in any given moment.

This is complete honouring of your mind, body and spirit.

Although it may seem difficult, when you are fully in tune with yourself – listening, watching and observing while simultaneously interacting with the world outside you, whether that is people, places or things, you begin to INTER-RELATE. From this place, there can be no me versus you and you get to experience your needs integrating with the environment you are in, without any push or pull.

So I invite you to give this a go.

To be fully present to the sensitivity of your emotions so that you are better able to cater to your core needs.

Feeling anxious? Ask your anxiety what it needs from you.
Feeling frustrated? Let the frustration speak to you on how it can find peace.
Feeling confused? Listen to the confusion so that it can unravel the true message it holds for you.
Feeling fearful? Hold your fear like a child until it begins to feel safe within you.

If you are interested in a self-care checklist to support this process, you can download for free self-care checklist while grieving.

If you are keen to work with me, you can make a booking here.

Free Guide To Exploring Loss Through Journalling (includes 24 prompts to get you started)